Meet the Trimble Family!
In July of 2015, I was saddened to find out that my great niece and nephew, ages 1 and 4, had been placed into foster care. After starting visits, Andre and Sapphire were finally placed in our home in July 2017, and we finalized the adoption almost two years later, on March 1, 2019.
At the time of foster placement, we were clueless as to how to navigate the various systems involved and how to obtain services. The bulk of our support came from a blend of our own systems (our adult children, employers, church family, immediate families) and the services provided to the children through DHS, CASA, attorney, mentor, therapists, teachers, and health care providers.
When we started on this journey, we did not expect that it would be as much of a challenge as it ended up being. We have been stunned by the ramifications that trauma has left behind, and the difficulty that we all have faced because of it. We find strength by practicing our faith, educating ourselves about specific issues, asking for help, setting personal boundaries, and most importantly, engaging in regular self-care.
After raising three children to adulthood, our household now consists of myself (Jammie); my
husband (Tiger); our teenage daughter (Tyra); Andre, now age 9; and Sapphire, now age 6.
Transitioning Andre and Sapphire into our home was an adventure akin to a roller coaster ride.
We have experienced difficulties along the way due to unspoken expectations mixed with the heightened emotions that a change as drastic as this causes.
We would like our legislators to know that this was a very difficult, confusing process.
Many of the difficulties could have been circumvented with the right support. We encountered overzealous relatives and adults with differing motivations and goals, which even resulted in legal issues. During this time, we grew increasingly concerned about some
behaviors the children exhibited. It became clear that we needed help to establish appropriate
boundaries between the children and all adults involved. We expended invaluable time and
money on issues we felt could have been dealt with by more direct support from the State,
We would like to see ongoing mediation, legal services and counseling provided to kinship families and the other family members to help all the parties to learn what’s best for the children and to come to an agreement, rather than leaving families to figure this out on their own.
Fortunately, the children are now thriving and blossoming into intelligent, emotionally regulated, healthy siblings. Andre, a talkative, bright-eyed fourth-grader, is leaping over the hurdles life has placed in front of him. He loves all things sports and playing with other children. Happy, vivacious Sapphire, a first-grader, is a “unicorn and rainbows” princess who loves dressing up, singing, and performing theatrically. Tyra has adapted beautifully to being a big sister
The qualities that keep our family bound are mutual love, respect, admiration for each other, and open communication. The qualities the children have that help us to love them are their vulnerabilities, their innocence, their loving hearts, and their willing spirits. My hope for our family is to continue to raise happy, healthy, confident children, and to support them in living up to their fullest capacities.
