Meet the Tupler Family!
Anne Tupler always knew that she wanted to be a mother, so she decided not to let the fact that she was single stop her from providing a family to a child who needed her. Anne’s daughter Marissa, age six, was placed into foster care when she was 15 months old. She was placed in Anne’s home when she was 20 months old and officially joined the Tupler family when her adoption was finalized six months later.
Marissa is a bright and usually happy child. About every two months or so, she tends to go through short periods of aggression and anger that last for a few days, but otherwise, she is helpful, considerate, and empathetic to adults and children alike. A very artistic and creative girl, Marissa loves to draw, paint, color, and create mixed media art. She sings a LOT—although it’s often off-key, according to Anne. She makes up most of the songs she sings. She also loves gymnastics, dancing, and karate. She currently attends The Studio School, a new Adams 12 magnet school focused on the arts.
Anne and Marissa know that their family of two is unique, while also having a lot in common with many other families. Anne says, “Although our family is small, it is happy, stable and fun! We make time for playing together. We make up stories and songs. We talk about current events. We have rules and routines. We eat our meals together and talk about our day.”
Anne believes that adopting children from the foster care system is really a wonderful thing to do and that going through the adoption process ensures that parents are ready to care for children who have been traumatized. Anne says, “The children need parents who have made a conscious choice to be parents and are willing to do whatever it takes to meet the child(ren)’s needs. The classes required before being eligible really make you look at yourself and your motivation.”
Although Marissa was quite young when she and Anne became a family, issues still come up related to the circumstances that led to Marissa being removed from her birth family and placed in foster care. Thanks to the requirements and preparation involved in becoming approved to adopt from foster care, Anne feels better equipped to handle the issues and challenges that arise.
Post-adoption services have also provided helpful support for the Tupler family as they face, and seek to minimize challenges. The adoption subsidy and Medicaid coverage that Anne receives for Marissa makes it possible for Marissa to get the medical and mental health services that she needs.
Anne wants Members of Congress to understand that when they cut funding for human services, the services that vulnerable children—including children adopted from foster care—depend on get cut too. Anne wants us all to keep those children, and the families who step up to care for them, in mind: “Their lives can be changed in positive ways, but it requires a lot of patience and help. We cannot do it alone.”
