Meet the Amos Family!
When Jennifer married Will Amos, she became a wife and mother simultaneously. Will’s five-year-old son Eddie led Jennifer to quickly realize her capacity to nurture and parent a child not born to her. Jennifer and Will both loved children and did not want Eddie to grow up as an only child. Adoption from foster care appealed to them because they preferred a child closer to Eddie’s age over an infant. They read profiles of children awaiting adoption on the Adoption Exchange website and they attended an Adoption Exchange function at the Family Fun Center. The couple chose to work with Jeffco Social Services because of that agency’s system for introducing children available for adoption. Just one year after starting the process, daughter Abby joined the family.
Born in Puerto Rico to a teenaged mother, Abby was raised largely by her grandmother, first in California and later in Colorado. Due to her grandmother’s health issues, Abby was reunited at age four with her mother in California, where she joined the household that included her mother’s boyfriend and their baby boy. A year later the two children entered foster care and the parent's rights were terminated. Abby was then returned to Jeffco foster care. Two months later, at age six, she was placed in the Amos’ home.
Now ages sixteen and fifteen, Eddie and Abby are enjoying high school, diverse interests, and the special sibling bond they have formed over the years. A history and science buff, Eddie’s curiosity has led him to amass an extensive store of knowledge on many topics. (His mom says, “He’s one you’d always want on your trivia team!”) Eddie enjoys movies, computer games, and competitive swimming. A high school junior, Eddie is considering joining the Marines before attending college. Known for her friendliness and leadership skills, Abby was a “peer leader” and also president of her 8th-grade class last year. She participates in pageants, modeling, and dancing. She also babysits and assists children with severe special needs. Now as a high school freshman, Abby is part of the Marching Band in the Color Guard. Severe dyslexia makes academics an ongoing challenge for Abby. She plans to pursue a career in dance, with the goal of owning a dance studio with a focus on helping children with special needs discover the joy she finds in dance.
Jennifer explains the challenges she and Will have faced as adoptive parents.“The biggest one was integrating the kids so they actually felt like brother and sister. When they were little, it was a big challenge. At this point, they are close and share teenage traumas and advice with each other.” Their current adoption-related undertaking lies in finding the best ways to encourage and support their daughter as she expresses curiosity about her birth family, especially her younger half-brother, and the desire to see them at some future point. The Amos’ find their post-adoption financial support invaluable in helping them to provide the special tutoring Abby needs due to dyslexia. They also appreciate opportunities through the Adoption Exchange for special activities Abby has participated in, such as modeling in a fashion show and giving a speech at a fund-raising event. Jennifer and Will do not view their family as unique. They say of themselves, “We are two parents, both teachers, struggling to do the best we can with two teenagers (both just getting learner’s permits –eek!) to create caring citizens. We try to prioritize opportunities that give us common bonding experiences such as vacations and spending time with extended family. We feel that those activities give us connections that other families might take for granted.”
The Amos’ ask members of Congress to extend the tax credits beyond the actual adoption year in order to support families’ attempts to bond as a unit through travel or other opportunities, as well as to seek counseling from adoption professionals on current family dynamics and birth family issues. They would also like their senators and representatives to be aware of the difficulties of finding local, quality providers who accept Medicaid due to the excessive “hoops” they have to go through. “It would be very nice if there were positive incentives for providers!”
2009 Portrait Project-Representative Mike Coffman
