Meet the Stubbs Family!
November is a time of year when we tend to count our blessings and express our gratitude more than usual. November holds a particularly special place in our hearts. November is the month we (Darcy and Evan) were selected by Families First Network to care for two of three of our children that we have since adopted. November is also the month that we finalized the adoption of our middle child. While each of our children has a different story that is their own, there are two sides to every story. This is ours.
After being married for five years, we had experienced our share of losses. Losses we weren’t sure that we would recover from. We decided that in order to heal our hearts we needed to look outside ourselves and see another plan God might have for our family. We went through nine weeks of adoption classes, filled out all the home study paperwork, completed our fingerprints, and did all the other items to be an approved adoptive family.
After nine months of waiting, hoping, and praying, we received a call asking us if we would be interested in being considered for a 16-month-old girl. We cannot even put into words what we felt. We were finally chosen after many times of not being matched with children we were interested in. Chosen to be parents of a child that had gone through many trials in her little life. We had no idea what she looked like, the color of her eyes or her hair, but her courage and strength inspired us! Meeting M for the first time was unforgettable. From the hands of her social worker, she—dressed in a little red jacket—reached out to me and we had an immediate connection.
Our next adoption was more complicated. It was another emergency placement—this time of a 2.5-year-old girl. D came off the airplane in a daze, with a red tattered blanket in hand, a pink velvet jacket, and a small backpack of belongings. In those early days, she struggled daily with bouts of anger, frustration, and not understanding where she was and who we were. It took time for her brain to process what was going on and why her life had changed so dramatically. During her adoption process, we had many barriers, including missed paperwork, caseworker changes, and other legal issues. But we were able to adopt her after 7 months and 10 days. When asked to tell the judge why we wanted to adopt D, our answer was simple, ”We love her and she belongs with us.”
Three years later, we received another November phone call asking if we wanted to be considered for a three-year-old boy. Once again, we were chosen! L exuded light and joy—it could be felt in his presence. He celebrated his future of stability, love, and family. L was home.
Our family loves to be outside at the beach, riding bikes, swimming, etc. We also love to go on a good road trip and travel as much as we can. Since our kids didn’t grow up as a traditional family, we work hard to provide them with lots of memories of time spent together.
We want all children who need a family to have this same opportunity, and wish policymakers would better support adoption professionals so they have the time to devote to the critical job of finding families for children who need them.
There were many times during our adoption journey where our faith was tested, but we never gave up hope. We just gave it to our loving Heavenly Father to guide the way. And now we are a family.
